FranniePantz: July 2013

July 31, 2013

Vulgar Wednesday

I don't know what it was about today. But I have to say it is the most vulgar Wednesday I've had in a minute. Allow me to elaborate . . .

Myself, I was cranky, hot, frustrated, stressed and annoyed today. So I said a few obscenities today. That I will admit. But apparently, mine was not the only sharp tongue around today.

I made two trips to the Court today. It was fun. Especially since I didn't anticipate going to Court, so I had to damn near undress twice to get in the joint to get through the security.

But as I was walking up to the Court the second time, I had to laugh. A couple and two, what I assume to be attorneys by their dress and demeanor, walk out of the Court room doors. And this is what I, nay, the entire parking lot, hear next:

Woman of the couple: "Man! You got screwed and didn't even get kissed mother f&*%#er!"

And then, just in case there was someone in town that didn't hear her, she repeated it. Even louder. The assumed lawyers just hung their heads, awkwardly smiled and tried to shuffle away with the quickness.

Then, I stopped at a church I'd never been to, tucked inside of a quiet neighborhood to take these photos. I'm not really a church-goer, but it was really cute. And they had a cute little community garden and everything. So I sit down to take the below shot, go back to the camera to check it and realize . . .

Someone else had been there who was interested in getting screwed apparently . . .

Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

Herringbone Slim Trousers-BDG, thrifted; Tank-Scusa, gifted; Cropped Moto Jacket-Miley Cyrus; Sandals-Candie's; Monogram Necklace-Target; Earrings-gifed; Studded Bracelets-Kohl's; Jeweled Bracelet-gifted

July 30, 2013

Share the Covers--Ring of Fire

The original that everyone knows by Johnny Cash . . .

The cover that most people have heard by Social Distortion . . .

I chose this song for obvious reasons. It's hot. That short lived cold spell was cute and all, but now we're back to business. Sticky business. But, I'm not going to complain because once it gets cold (i.e. 65 degrees and under for me), I'm gonna complain about it being cold.

When we were on vacation in California a couple of weeks back, the temperature didn't get above 75. It was cloudy. And 90% of the time, we were on or at least near the ocean and it's chilly little breezes. At one point on Santa Monica pier, I even hid in the bathrooms for a bit to warm myself under the hand dryers. I kept shivering in my tank top, shorts and flip flops (why would I pack anything else really?) and muttering "Holy crap I can't wait to get back to Colorado where it's warm!!!"

Polka Dot Tiered Dress-thrifted; Leopard Print Cardigan-thrifted; Two Tone Cap Toe Heels-Franco Sarto; Earrings-gifted

July 29, 2013

Mission Monday #14--It's All Coming Back to Me Now (Making Vintage Modern)

I have had a lot going on and it is driving me insane. For starters, my camera has been in the shop getting cleaned and I just got it back today. But now it needs to be sent off to be internally cleaned as well I guess. And our washing machine broke. And this weekend we had my niece and my nephew's birthdays and parties. The V.A. loan that Patrick and I have been working on for months to get us pre-approved for a house is taking every possible wrong turn. And school starts in two weeks.

I could go on and on but I'll just stop there. It has been causing my brain to go into a psychotic overload of to-do's. So much so that I had a fashion networking event on Saturday. And RSVP-ed to it weeks ago. And was looking forward to it. And spaced it.

To add to this, Patrick went to the eye doctor today and found out that he has 350/20 vision. For those of you like me who don't understand what that means really, it means he is blind as a bat. They dilated the ever living out of his eyes so I'm currently his seeing eye wife.

What does this have to do with next week's Mission Week? Nothing at all. But the gist is that we are taking vintage pieces or styles and making them modern. Like this quasi colonial look I'm sporting today--vintage necklace from my Grandmother, black maxi skirt and taupe button down. Incredibly matronly, but making it work with a slight sexy kitten heel, ruffled details on the shirt and belting the skirt.

Black Maxi Skirt-DKNY, gifted; Taupe Ruffled Front Button Down Blouse-NY & Co., thrifted; Black Kitten Heels-BCBG, gifted; Necklace-vintage

July 26, 2013

Mission #13, Day 5, Tip 5--LINK UP!!!

My last tip for Mission Week won't be for everyone. It involves shorts in the office which for most people won't fly in the office. But for those of us where it is allowed, here are my tips.

First and foremost, as old school as it is, it is imperative that your shorts pass the fingertip test. No Daisy Dukes are going to pass the office test. I guar-ran-tee-it.

As you can see by my eloquently demonstrated photo above, these do. My second tip regards the shape of the shorts. It may seem like a no-brainer, but you don't want to be caught in tight ass shorts at the office.

Third, think of the design and fabric. In other words--no denim. No frayed edges. Nothing too wacky. Keep it classy. These shorts are leather, but they are baggier, longer and dressier.

Plus, I stand by my go-to formula and that is this: add a blazer to nearly anything and it can damn near always pass the office dress code laws.

Leather Shorts-Lauren Conrad; White Blazer-Ann Taylor, thrifted; Mint Sheer Tank Top-thrifted; Platform Oxfords-Ana, gifted; Sunnies-Target; Earrings-gifted

July 25, 2013

Mission #13, Day 4, Tip 4

My next piece of summer-office-dressing advice for Mission Week is this: light and simple layers. Use them.

It's hard to layer anything in the summer. Just the thought of extra clothes sounds torturous amiright? But if you have something light that is easy-on for the glacial temperatures in most offices and easy-off when you finally break free from your work day is heavenly.

I got this cardigan several years ago and it used to be one of my favorites. It still is. But every time I wear it I think of a comment one of my best friends Chris said to me when I wore it to the office one day:

"Take that off. It looks like you're wearing lingerie." It's not. But I see his point. It's sheer with drapey sleeves. Nonetheless, not lingerie and perfect for a light layer in the summertime.

Speaking of layers, I have been plagued with guilt over my hair lately. Can you believe how long it's gotten in the six months since I chopped it? Time to call my girl Vanessa. STAT.

Coral Button Down Blouse-thrifted; Polka Dot Skirt-thrifted; Tweed Flats-Target; Sheer Cardigan-Kohl's; Heart Earrings-gifted

July 24, 2013

Mission #13, Day 3, Tip 3

One of the most important things to look for when dressing for summer in the office is to look at the tag. Why? Well this brings us to Tip #3 for Mission Week.

Fabric. The fabric of a garment can save you during the summer heat. Now, I can only attest to Colorado heat, which is very dry. Literally the average humidity in the summer is about 50%, which isn't much of a difference from the rest of the year.

So what are the best fabrics to look for in the summer? Well there are several blends of artificial fabrics that will help beat the heat like acrylic and rayon.

But some of the best natural fabrics to look for are silk, cotton and linen. On this day, I went for a sheer button down and some cotton trousers. With the burning temps, it's hard to get away with trousers, but in an office setting, you might have to pull them out every so often in the summer.

Sheer can be a really hard thing to pull off in an office. But, if executed correctly, it can look very chic as opposed to trashy.

As I said, I am not sure if this is absolutely applicable in areas with high humidity, but I would imagine that it is fairly universal. I just have never experienced a humid summer. My hair can't hang ifyaknowwhatimsayin.