March 9, 2012

Berry Glad It's Friday


Today I felt like berry flavored Bubbalicious bubble gum.  Must have been the rich coral skirt and berry colored cardigan.   That's the reason for the pun in the title. 

Also because I am very glad that it is Friday.  I have been uber stressed and not feeling well.  This is a bad combination at work.  Stress and nausea really can make a person loose their focus and make stupid little mistakes.  That was me today.  In fact, that was me all week.  

And I hate to make mistakes at work.  Here's the thing: I'm a paralegal and do work for five different attorneys.  There is another paralegal there, but she does work for one other attorney in our office.  

Basically, in our firm I am at the bottom of the food chain.  I am surrounded by smart and talented attorneys all day long.  People that know current events, classic movies and go to real sophisticated events like orchestras and ballets.  

And then there's me.  I don't have a law degree.  I was not raised in a well educated or sophisticated or cultural household.  We were simple people.  I didn't have exposure to all of the things that these people have.  

I don't have an extensive vocabulary and I am the only one in the office who dresses the way that I do (i.e. not in a suit or name brands, unless thrifted of course).  Usually, this doesn't really bother me.  

But some days I find myself in a "what the hell am I doing here/with my life/in this job" kind of mood.  Don't get me wrong, I do still enjoy doing paralegal work.  I do like interacting with clients.  I do like the people that I work for and with, very much.  

But sometimes it does wear on me a bit.  Especially when the entire office really counts on me.  My work really is important and even critical at times.  So when I make ridiculous mistakes, it makes me feel like a complete idiot and like I've let people down.  And it is really hard not to make mistakes when you are pulled in 15 directions all day by several different people.

 Aw well.  Say la vie I guess and start back fresh, rested, de-stressed and hopefully not ill next week because it is the weekend baby!!!! 

Even though I love Fridays, sometimes they can bum me out.  This is largely because most weekends during the school year my younger kids' dad takes them for the weekend and I don't get to hang out with them.  

It is really crazy the attachment that you have to your children as a mother.  Sometimes, my kids drive me insane all week long--fighting, bickering, whining, not listening, etc.  But when they are not with me, I always, always miss them.  I know it's only two days, but those two days can quickly feel like two weeks to a mom. 

So every Friday morning, I have made it a point to make it a little more special for my kiddos.  I make cinnamon rolls every Friday morning.  This morning, at Conner's request, I even made mint chocolate frosting to put on them.  It was a good call.  It doesn't make up for the fact that I won't see them, but the extra time and effort with them on Friday mornings sure helps make little insignificant mistakes at work a lot more tolerable.  And unimportant in the scheme of things.  And even though I can sometimes feel like a dumbass, I know that at least I can make a mean mint chocolate frosting.  And an even better looking chocolate covered smile on my kids' faces.  

Coral Tiered Midi Skirt-Marshall's; White Tee-Mudd; Wine Colored Cardigan with Lace Detail on Back-Kohl's; Multicolored Pumps-Nine West, gifted; Purple Necklace-Kohl's

1 comment:

  1. Frannie, you look lovely in this outfit.
    Please don't be so hard on yourself. Education alone doesn't make a person better than anyone else. I've known some well educated people who were the dumbest people ever when it came to common sense. Don't ever sell your self short. Even the best make mistakes. I know I made a bunch of them. Everyone does, the best you can do is learn from your mistakes and try to do better next time.


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