January 23, 2013

Let It Be


 

I've heard a lot of talk in general but especially as of late about body image.  While this is a pretty average thing for a style blogger to talk about, I want to touch on the topic today in another way.  Here's the thing: all bodies are beautiful.  Just like style, everyone's body is different.  And all of them are individual to the person with the style or in the body.

But most of the body love talk I hear is regarding the idea that "real women have curves" and that you don't need to be skinny to be beautiful and it is true.  You don't need to be skinny to be beautiful.  But . . .

You can be skinny and beautiful too.  I've had three kids.  My body weight has fluctuated immensely over the years.  When I was a teenager, I was chubby.  Not fat, but I had some baby weight for sure.  And I hated my body in the way that every teenage girl does.  Then, as a teenager, I had my oldest son.  And I went from teenager baby weight to after baby baby weight.  

My boyfriend at the time would talk so much smack about my body to the point that I would feel actually ashamed to eat.  I had a bout with diet pills and mild anorexia for a time there, allowing myself one small meal a day and punishing myself with not eating the next day if I indulged in a bite more than that.  I had my second son and I gained a decent amount of weight, but by that time, it was not long until I was back to my original size.  After my daughter, though, I weighed 170 pounds, which is by no means huge at all, but for my body frame, it was very awkward looking.  It took so much work to loose the weight, but it was also done in a very healthy way--exercise, cutting out sugars and junk food and eating healthy snacks.

Between my body's naturally high metabolism, the very skinny genes in my family, high stress most of the time and running around after three kids, I've been the weight I am now for about five years.  And even though I am now considered pretty small, it does not stop the body hatred that I hear sometimes.  I don't really have "curves". 

Even when I weighed more, I hardly had a chest.  And hearing all the time about how real women have curves and my simultaneous lack thereof made me feel like less of a woman.  I get accused a lot about being on drugs or having an eating disorder or being called a skinny bitch or hearing jokes about how I need to gain weight.

Moral of the story here: you can't please everyone and you might quite literally kill yourself trying.  So don't worry about what anyone else thinks about your body.  It in and of itself is an amazing instrument that has undoubtedly endured more than anyone else will ever realize.  So love your body for what it is and let it be.

 Pleated Rusty Rose Skirt with Leather Band-Target; Beatles Tee-Wal-Mart; Denim Vest-Christopher and Banks, thrifted and DIYed; Striped Socks-Target; Booties-Old Navy; Bracelet-vintage from Grandma; Ring-unknown; Earrings-gifted

1 comment:

  1. I love this post for what you wrote. I could go on and on with my weight struggles, but I won't. I will say though that it has been extremely hard for to accept my weight right now post baby. It is very hard for me to not compare myself to mothers who had babies when I did and wonder why they are skinny already and I'm not. Since having my baby, I still weigh about 15 pounds more than before I was pregnant. I attribute it to a lot of things: my age, I still breast feed, I'm tired so I don't work out...but I know something has to change because I can hear the demons in my head from when I was a teenager creeping back in telling me that I look gross and I need to slim down.

    It's such a mind game and I love that you said, that you have to lose weight for YOURSELF and no one else. That is very true. I am slowly (very slowly) trying to turn it all around and lose the last 15 pounds by doing a version of Weight Watchers. I'm three weeks in now and I've lost 3 pounds. But I will know the real difference when my clothes start to get too big. And you actually are the first person I've told (I'm not sure I want to announce it on my blog) because I'm so afraid of failing. Believe me, I've tried a myriad of ways since having my son to try and drop the last 15. But nothing ever works. The WW actually is, but I'm too afraid to say anything, lest I jinx myself.

    Anyway, I said this wasn't going to be long and now look at what I've done. LOL. Your post inspired me and I hope it does others as well! <3

    toni

    ReplyDelete

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