December 23, 2012

Make It So


Being a divorced parent can really suck during the holidays.  Because most times, you are sharing your holidays.  Which means in most instances, every other year you find yourself sans kiddos on the holidays.

This year I don't have all my kids on Christmas morning.  And they were talking about this issue on the radio last week.  And a friend of mine on FB was discussing it there.  So it really got me thinking about the first Christmas I was alone without my kids.

The first Christmas after my ex and I broke up, he got them for Christmas morning.  It was awful.  My family had gone out of state to my Grandpa's house, but I couldn't go because I was expecting my kids back to my house.  So literally I was all alone.

Getting frustrated with all the standard "Merry Christmas!" texts, I unplugged my phone.  I turned on death metal.  I set up a kitchen set for my daughter.  The kids came late to my house.  And by the time they got there, they were exhausted and all Christmas-ed out.  

And I know that I am not alone in this.  It sucks.  But here's the thing you must remember: it isn't every Christmas.  And because of that, the Christmases that you do have with your kids get to be that much specialer. 

This year, knowing that I don't have my kids nor my husband, I knew I would have to do some improvising of my time, energy and strategy.

We haven't cleaned the house for company.  We haven't adhered to a strict bedtime.  Instead, we baked extra cookies.  We wrapped presents.  I smiled at my kids' self-imposed idea to gift wrap some of their own toys for their friends and cousins.

Conner got to go to his first Bronco's game tonight with my brother.  He got a jersey.  And he wore his new Bronco jacket (it's legit).  He was amazed.  And everyone there was in love with him.  One woman even gave him her Bronco's Santa hat.  And he got on the megatron thing.  

I won't get to see the magic of Christmas morning in their eyes this year.  But watching Conner's expression when he got back from the Bronco game, seeing Brielle's pride and amazement when she tastes the cookies that she all but made herself and watching Kaden salute in his camo gear in every single picture since Patrick's deployment--is nothing to dismiss either.

So no matter who you get to spend your holidays with and where and what your plans are, just remember it's called the holiday season for a reason.

Have yourself a "holy moly I ate too much pie, high pitched giggle, children singing Christmas songs, wrapping paper freaking everywhere, where are the AA's, omg I can't believe you made this, remember last year when we . . ." Merry little Christmas.

 Gold Button Down Silk Blouse-Jones and New York, thrifted; Distressed Skinny Jeans-Kohl's; Belt-Kohl's; Metallic Cap Toe Studded Heels-Chinese Laundry; Coat-Wal-Mart; Bangles-Kohl's; Earrings-gifted

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